Everyday Delussions or why - I AM BILL

Everyday delusions

How we see ourselves and see others are the most common everyday delusions. I know a lot of people that think of themselves as complex when they appear to be almost stereotypes for certain social groups. I suspect this is a defence mechanism because there is a degree of self loathing in the personality of a lot of people. “I can’t be a Jock, all jocks are self centered dorks.”

My personal self loathing is nerdiness. To me a nerd is someone that dresses up as Worf to go to a star trek convention, or can talk for hours about the merits of “the spice.” Aside from Scifi a nerd also can be a bookworm or a fan of Cher who makes model cars at age 41. However, I have a library in my apartment; I still occasionally build models (ships planes etc…) Somewhere in my library I have the plans for the starship Enterprise, and I wear a tie to work even though my director doesn’t. I watch star trek (any of them)am I a nerd? Maybe.

So is it really important what boxes we put ourselves into or what boxes other people put us into? The answer is simple , NO. Putting yourself in or out of a box is simplifying yourself or defining yourself by standards that will inevitably limit who you are. I may be a nerd by my own definition or by the definition of others but does that make me a better or worse person? No. To think of people outside of these boxes improves us and can better our lives. How? I have a friend who has a treky licence plate but no one would call him a nerd because he is also a foremost authority on Classical studies. If I met him at a trek conference would I think of him as a great thinker, or would I put him in the nerd box? I have a friend that plays in a punk band, but is one of the best government policy analysts in Canada. If I was to place either of these individuals in stereotype boxes before I got to know them would I actually have taken the time to get to know them? If punks tend to be anarchists and as my associate is a punk do I want to associate with anarchists?


My actions do not define me, my words are not all of me, and my clothes do not make me. I am many things and none should be abhorrent to me. I am a nerd in some ways, I am simple at times and complex at others, I have jock tendencies I am a feminist male, who has some sexist tendencies. All these things are part of me they are not me.

In truth “I AM BILL”